


Playing it Down - JohnDave

by Kapdixo



Series: Playing it Down 'verse [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Abuse, Child Abuse, F/M, Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2017-12-07
Packaged: 2019-02-08 03:26:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 6,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12855732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kapdixo/pseuds/Kapdixo
Summary: Trigger warning: Abuse.Being the new kid at school always sucks, but John makes friends with Dave fairly quickly. But what is Dave actually hiding?





	1. New Home

John took a deep breath, staring at the school doors. How could something so simple seem so intimidating?

No, he could do this.

"Alright, here goes nothing." He threw the doors open, then glanced down at his schedule. "Oh, Calculus. Great." He trudged down the hallway with a grimace. Why did he have to move during the middle of a semester, anyways? And why New York? People could be so unfriendly sometimes!

"Hmph." John finally arrived at his first class, quietly sliding into an empty seat. "Okay, I made it in one piece." He took out a pencil just in case. It was always good to be prepared.

"I sit there," a thick Southern accent drawled.

Like right now.

"Oh, I'm sorry." John stood up, nearly bumping foreheads with the person. "Um."

"Sup?" It was a boy, possibly a year older than him. He had blonde hair that looked soft like a baby chick's (he'd never say that out loud), and a pair of shades that obscured his eyes. "Never seen you before."

"I-I'm John Egbert," he squeaked.

"Dave Strider." He shook his hand. "Weird name."

"It's what I was born with," he shrugged.

"Fair." Dave sat down in the seat, then pointed to the one next to him. "Sit there, it's open."

"Oh, thank you!" John beamed. "I'm from Washington, by the way!"

"Far from your old home," he mused. "I'm from the South, if you couldn't tell. Texas."

"Is it hot there?" he asked.

"Felt like I was gonna burn my dick off some days. Speaking of which...everything's bigger in Texas." Dave's stoic face gave way to a smirk, and he nodded to his pants. "If you know what I mean."

"Oh my god!" John covered his face. "You can't just say things like that!"

"Can't I?" He stared at his shirt. "That's a slime monster, right?"

"Oh, yeah!" He pointed to his. "That's a vinyl record. Do you collect them?"

"No, I'm an amateur DJ." Dave looked proud. "Maybe I can drop some sick fires for you one day."

"I'd like that a lot!" John sat up straight as the bell rang.

"Good morning," the teacher said.

"What's good about it?" a brunette grumbled.

"You'll be learning new things, Mr. Vantas," the teacher growled.

"Whatever." The 'Mr. Vantas' in question put his head down.

"Okay then. Everyone, we have a new student. His name is John Egbert, and I assume you will treat him with respect. Oh, and my name is Ms. Serket." A sickeningly sweet smile spread across her face, clearly forced.

"She doesn't want to be here, does she?" John whispered.

"Nope," Dave whispered back.

"Care to share with the class, boys?" Ms. Serket snapped.

"No thank you," John murmured.

"Yep," Dave announced. "Just talking about how cool I am." A few classmates giggled.

"Fucking Striders."

"Stupid pokerface."

"Hey, stop that!" John stood up with an irritated look. "What gives you the right to talk about him like that?"

"He's a clusterfuck of a bulgesucking drama queen." 'Mr. Vantas' lifted his head.

"Shut up, Karkat." Dave's eyes seemed to narrow behind his shades, not that someone would be able to tell. "You know you love macking on me after school and between classes."

"Ohhhhhhh, shit!" a redhead droned.

"Shut the fuck up, Terezi!" 'Mr. Vantas', now 'Karkat', blushed heavily. "I'd sooner eat my own hand than do that!"

"Enough!" Ms. Serket shouted. "Mr. Strider, Mr. Egbert, Mr. Vantas, and Miss Pyrope! Out in the hall! Now!"

"Thanks, buttmunch," Karkat scowled as he passed Dave's desk.

"My first day sure is going great," John groaned.

"At least you aren't alone!" Terezi looked in his general direction. "I'm Terezi, and you smell great!"

"Thanks?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Crazy bitch is blind," Karkat explained. "She relies on her sense of smell and...just don't let her lick you."

"It's a Monday, right?' Dave lead them into the hallway, sliding down the wall.

"Wednesday," Terezi corrected.

"Feels like a Monday." He sighed quietly. "Have fun in detention, Egbert."

"Aw, man." John shook his head. "Great."

"Hey, at least you don't have an older brother to kick your ass for getting in trouble." Dave crossed his arms.

"Little extreme to put it that way," he winced.

"Well, I didn't mean literally." His eyes were frightened behind the shades.

"This day sucks."

"Couldn't agree more."

Welcome to New York.


	2. Fruity Rumpus

"Yo, Egderp!" Dave called.

"It's Egbert." John turned around. "What is it?"

"Want to come over?" He bit his lip. "I mean, you don't have to."

"Sure! Just let me call my dad!" He took out his phone and began dialing. "Hello? Yeah, it went okay. Well, I got detention. Oh, I stood up for someone who was being picked on. I was wondering if it was okay that he invited me over? Yes, I promise. Really? Thank you so much! Huh? I love you too, dad." He hung up, grinning. "Let's do this!"

"Cool, just follow me." Dave began walking, and so they did for about five minutes. "Here we are." He pointed to a tall apartment building.

"Whoah! That's so cool!" John eagerly threw the door open and pranced into the elevator. "Come on!"

"I usually use the stairs, but okay." He chased after him and hit the button for the highest floor.

"You walk that much?! Why?" He shook his head.

"Exercise," Dave shrugged. "Gotta be in decent shape if I'm gonna spar with Bro."

"You two...spar? What are you, ninjas?" John scoffed.

"Nah, but I do have a katana like a certain turtle." He shot him a teasing grin.

"You have to show me that!" He smiled as the door opened. "Let's go!"

"You're really happy about this." Dave slowly unlocked the door, acting like someone approaching a frightened animal.

"You okay?" John gasped as an arm shot out and tried to hit him. "Hey!" He covered his eyes.

"How was your day?" someone asked, poking a sword through the gap of the door.

"Bro, not now. We have company," he sighed.

"Company?" The door opened, revealing a man in his early thirties. He had blonde hair and shades like Dave, but his hair was spiked up, and his shades were pointed. Like a freaking anime character's. "Sup?"

"Er...hi." John slowly peered out from between his fingers. "M-may I come in?"

"Hmm...sure." The man stepped aside. "I'm his brother, but you can call me Dirk."

"Okay...Dirk." He went past him, jaw dropping. "It's really nice in here!"

"Thanks." Dave spoke for the first time in a while.

"You didn't tell me we were having company, little man." Dirk seemed agitated.

"Didn't plan on it happening." He stepped back a bit. "Introduce yourself."

"Oh, sorry!" John laughed. "I was being rude. I'm John Egbert!"

"It's cool." Dirk snapped his head over to the younger Strider. "Ready for some sparring on the roof?"

"You know I am." Dave pulled out the katana he mentioned.

"Wait, guys!" John came between the two of them. "Can we just hang out or something?"

"Well, I don't see why not." Dirk slowly got out of the way. "Dave, show him your room."

"Come on." Dave dragged him off, looking around nervously.

"What's up?" John attempted to follow his eyes, but he wasn't sure which direction they were headed.

"It's here somewhere," he whispered. "Gotta be alert."

"Alright then." John gasped as they made their way into his room. "It's so...awesome!"

"Damn straight." Dave watched as his new friend stared at his posters, bed, katanas, then turntables. "Wanna hear some sick fires now?"

"Do I ever!" He sat down on the floor. "Let's hear them!"

_"Yo, yo, what up, Egbert  
Ready for some fire rhymes  
Heh, of course you are  
Get ready for the best of times_

_Check it out right now  
I'm Dave Strider, the only one  
And let me just say something  
It's time for us to have some fun_

_You say you're from Washington  
And I admit, I really dig it  
Texas, however, not so much  
I don't like it one single bit_

_Washington, birthplace of George  
A place where our country began  
What does this have to do with this  
Well, alright, I'll tell you, man_

_It actually doesn't at all  
That's really just how rap rolls  
Now, one last thing before I go  
I really hope you like it, that was my goal."_ He stepped away from the turntables, looking at him expectantly. "Freestyle."

John's jaw dropped. "That was awesome!"

"Really?" Dave tilted his head.

"Yes! It was great!" He jumped up and down, then tripped over a wire.

"Shit!" He tried to push him out of the way, but it was too late.

The trap went off, the ceiling opened up, and they were suddenly buried in plush rumps.

"FUUUUUUUUUCK!"


	3. True Colors

"Ugh, should've been more careful." Dave's head popped out of the mountain of Smuppets. "Sorry, John. John? John?"

"Mmph!" John crawled out with a gasp. "What the hell are these things?!"

"Creepy porn dolls called Smuppets. Sorry about that." He held out his hand. "Bro loves setting traps for me, the sick bastard."

"That's weird, dude." He pushed them away in disgust. "Does he really have to do this?"

"It's how he is. I should've warned you, but I tried to protect you the best I could." Dave managed a small smile. "A lot of good that did."

"My hero," John swooned. "You're my knight in shining armor!"

"That's gay, but I like the sound of that. I'm a knight." He rubbed his chin. "Yeah, sounds good."

"I'm not a homosexual," he replied flatly.

"You know you want me. No one can resist the Strider Swag™." Dave's shades gleamed.

"You did not just say that." John facepalmed. "I'm so done here."

"Baby, please don't go." He grabbed his leg as he took a step towards the door. "I love you, I'll never be able to do better than you. I need you in my life."

"Now THAT'S gay." He shook his leg in a feeble attempt to dislodge his grip. He didn't budge. "Come on!"

"Nah." Dave just held on tighter. "I'm gonna stay here forever, just try and stop me."

"I think I hate New York." John finally squirmed away from him. "Ha!" He stuck out his tongue. "What now?"

"Well, do that again and I'll punch you in the mouth." He hesitated. "With my mouth. Softly."

"Gay," he whispered. "You're gay."

"Nah, man. Would you even care?" Dave raised an eyebrow.

"Not really, I'd support you." John snickered to himself. "Just don't hit on me anymore!"

"Whatever, you're not my type."

"The hell did you say to me?"

"Wait." He glanced around. "I have a secret to tell you, let no one know."

"Alright?" He watched him as he leaned down. "What is it?" He squeaked as he grabbed his shoulders. "Dave?"

"Is your ass jealous of all the shit coming out of your mouth right now?" Dave whispered.

"Very funny." John did show that he found it funny by giggling until there were tears in his eyes. "You're hilarious."

"Just like your stupid dork laugh, Egdork." His emotionless mask cracked, and he chuckled slightly. 

"There's a smile." John started laughing, wrapping his arms around his waist.

"Shut up!" Dave joined him, trying to push him away. "Haha, get off, Egdork!"

"Never!" He laughed harder, clutching his stomach. "Ow, ow, hurts."

"Jesus Christ." He stared up at the ceiling, taking deep breaths. "I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard."

"It's good for you. No wonder you're so cranky." John squealed as a leftover Smuppet landed in his lap. "Ew ew ew ew ew ew!"

"Ack! Don't throw it at me!" Dave ducked with a growl. "It's so on!"

"Help!" he screamed as he was tackled into the pile of plush rump. "I'm sorry, get them off of me now! I'm too young to die!"

"Should've thought about that before screwing with me!" He stood up, then pulled him over. "Alright, you're safe now."

"My hero! Again!" John rubbed his head. "Hard floor."

"Sorry that my brother is a prick," Dave hissed.

"You have a weird relationship," he muttered.

"Yeah, I guess we do." Unease crawled across Dave's face. "Um, you should probably get going. It's almost four."

"Oh, come on! I just got here!" John grinned at him. "You trying to get rid of me?" he teased.

"N-no, it's just that me and Bro spar at four, and you don't want to see that." He pointed to the door. "Go home, John."

"Alright, I get it. See you tomorrow!" He waved, then left the apartment.

"He's gone," Dave called.

"Good." Dirk slowly walked in. "I never said you could have anyone over."

"I know," he whispered. "But-"

"You know what happens when you disobey me, right?" He tapped his foot.

"I-I didn't plan on it happening." Dave slowly backed away.

"What's that mean?" Dirk stepped closer.

"Means what I said." He took another step back.

"I see." He paused, then scooped him up. "Let's go, little man. We have things to do."


	4. M.I.A.

Dave wasn't there the next day.

"Hey, guys?" John tapped Karkat's shoulder. "Have you seen Dave?'

"Haven't seen the prick," he shrugged.

"And I can't!" Terezi laughed. "But I know he's not here."

"Seriously? This is weird." John bit his lip.

"He's just sick or something, probably." Karkat rolled his eyes. "Don't worry so much."

"Yeah, you're right." He headed to his next class, smiling at the girl sitting next to him. "Hey, Roxy."

"Omg, hyeh!" Roxy shook her head. "I mean, hey! What's up?"

"Just worried about Dave. You know Dave Strider?" John asked.

"Do I! He's my cousin!" She twirled her finger around in a circle. "He's gone a lot, it's weird."

"Cousin, huh?" He rubbed his chin. "Hey, are you and that girl related?" He pointed to the blonde across the room.

"Yeah, she's my sirster!" Roxy beamed. "So she's his cousin too!"

"Thanks, Roxy." John slowly approached the other girl. "Um, hi."

"You must be John, correct?" She nodded once. "I'm Rose."

"Yeah, that's me!" His face turned serious. "You and Dave are cousins, right? Do you know where he is?"

"I'm afraid not." Rose looked concerned. "He really is absent frequently, but I do not know the reason behind it."

"Thanks." John looked at the girl next to her. "Who's this?"

"My girlfriend Kanaya." She reached out to take her hand.

"Hello, John," Kanaya waved. "Pleasure to meet you."

"Same!" He shook her hand. "I'll be moving on now, thank you!"

The period seemed to drag on and on.

"Okay, let's go!" John sprinted to his next class, then skidded to a stop. That kid looked like a younger version of Dirk. "Um, excuse me!" He approached him slowly. "Are you related to Dave?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "I'm Dirk."

"I thought Dirk was his brother." He looked confused.

"Yeah, I was named after him. He's my cousin. Crazy big family, right?' Dirk smiled for a moment. "What's up?"

"I'm worried about Dave," John admitted. "I don't know why, since he's only absent today. I can't help but worry for some reason."

A look of fear crossed his face, then quickly vanished. "I don't know, maybe you could check on him after school."

"Wow, thanks!" He went to sit down with a smile.

Dirk took off his shades, rubbing his eyes. "Striders don't cry."

The bell couldn't ring fast enough, and the rest of the day was a blur. John rushed out the door, jogging to the apartment building. "Why do I even care?" By the time he got into the elevator, he was panting. "Jesus Christ." He hit the button, then sat down on the floor. "It's nothing." The door opened at the top floor, only for a familiar face to walk in. Dirk.

Well, the Dave's brother one, not the cousin.

"Hey, Dirk!" John stood up. "Sorry, I was tired. How's Dave?'

"Sick," Dirk replied.

"Oh, can I go see him? I'll try to make him better!"

"Sorry, little man. I don't want you to catch anything."

"Oh, I don't mind! I'd be happy to help a friend!" He grinned at him.

"I'm sorry, but not right now." He didn't seem to be budging.

"Alright, hope I see him soon." John trudged back into the elevator dejectedly.

"He'll probably be back tomorrow," Dirk assured him.

"Oh, that's great!" He skipped out of the building once they got on the first floor, then made his way home.

"Hey, son." His dad nodded to him as he entered the house.

"Hey, dad! Today wasn't that good." John deflated. "Dave wasn't there. But I did get to meet some new people, so that was cool!"

"Good, good." He took the pipe out of his mouth. "You have to introduce me sometime."

"I will!" He went upstairs, flopping onto his bed. "I should get his chumhandle!" He sat up to look at his walls. Posters, and...that was it. His room was kind of plain, now that he thought about it. What would liven it up a little bit?

"Oh, I could ask Dave sometime!" John froze, staring at the ceiling. "I sure think about him a lot, don't I?" His eyes widened. "Oh...no, I can't. No, I'm not gay! Besides, I haven't even known him that long, it's not possible!" He decided to chalk it up to teenage hormones after a bit of thinking. "Heh, I'm just being paranoid."


	5. Truth or Lies

"Dave!" John nearly tackled him when he appeared the next day. "There you are!"

"You're acting like I died or something." Dave pushed him away. "I'm good now."

"I tried to visit you, but your brother said you were too sick! I'm sorry!" He stared at his face, noticing a black discoloration poking out from under his shades. "What's that?"

"Nothing." He sighed as he kept staring at him, so he lifted the shades and closed his eyes.

"Oh my gosh!" John gasped, slowly brushing his fingers over his black eye. "What happened?!"

"Ran into a doorknob while I was stumbling around sick." Dave put his shades back on.

"But...you're too tall for that!" he protested.

"Big door," he replied. The bell rang, and the teacher walked in.

"Fine, don't tell me." John sat down with a huff.

"Psst, hey." Karkat leaned over, passing him a piece of paper.

"Huh?" He opened it.

_He has bruises a lot, like on his arms and shit._

John gasped quietly, scribbling on it.

_How do you know? He wears long sleeves._

Karkat blushed, handing it back.

_We used to be boyfriends, and he liked wearing my shirts._

_Oh my god, that's so cute!_

"Mr. Egbert." Ms. Serket's voice cut through the air like a knife. "Are you passing notes to Mr. Vantas?"

"No?" he tried to lie.

"I have a rule in my class." She tapped her fingernails on her desk. "If I catch you passing notes, you have to read them out loud."

"Um..." John bit his lip.

"Here, I'll read it!" Karkat snatched it from him, holding it up. "It says, _'Ms. Serket is a fucking bitch'_ , so there!" Then he stuffed it in his mouth and ate it.

"Holy shit, dude." Dave bit back a laugh.

"You...get out!" Ms. Serket pointed to the hall. "Double detention now!"

"That's not a thing," Karkat pointed out with a smug grin. "But fine, bye." He strutted out the door to the applause of students.

"Slay, bitch, slay!" Meenah shouted.

"That. Was. Great." Dave began snickering. "Go, Kitkat."

"Is he really your ex?" John asked.

"Yeah, but it was mutual. We broke up with no hard feelings." He grinned slightly. "But it was nice being with him."

"No hard feelings? He acts like he hates you!" he exclaimed.

"He treats everyone like that. Haven't you noticed?" Dave opened his textbook. "Fine, I broke up with him because Bro didn't approve. He doesn't like me being gay."

"That's awful! I'm so sorry!" John grabbed his hand. "No one should have to go through that!"

"Like I said, there were still no hard feelings." He went back to his book.

"Oh." He needed to talk to Karkat, but how? He was in the hallway. Unless...

"Ow!" Ms. Serket growled after a wad of paper hit her in the head. "Who threw that?!"

Everyone pointed at John, including himself. "Me. Okay, I know the drill, I'm leaving." He went into the hall, finding a smirking Karkat on the floor. "Hey."

"I saw that." He snickered quietly. "It was great."

"Look, I need to talk to you. See, I'm worried about Dave, and since he's your ex, you could answer my questions." He slowly backed away as anger radiated off the boy.

"That. Is none. Of your. Business." Karkat sighed when he saw he wouldn't back down. "What do you want to know?"

"He has a black eye, and I think he lied about walking into a doorknob. Do you know what happened?" John watched his face fall. "You okay?"

"Yeah, fine. He probably got it from his brother." He ran a hand through his hair. "Happens sometimes."

"His brother hurts him?!" he shouted.

"Shh!" Karkat clamped a hand over his mouth. "It was probably an accident, they've sparred a lot. You shouldn't worry."

"But..." John took his hand away. "Okay, I believe you."

"Good. Don't ask about it anymore, it might make him upset. He doesn't want to show any fucking weakness." The bell rang, and he stood up. "See you fifth period, asshole."

"You too?" He rolled his eyes. "So weird." He nearly bumped into Dave as he ran out. "What's up?"

"Class is on the other end of the school." He handed a piece of paper to him before sprinting off into the crowd.

"Huh." John looked down at the paper.

_my chumhandle is turntechGodhead_


	6. In My Tree

Six months had passed, but it felt like they went by quick.

"John, will you go out with me?" Dave asked as they left John's house in the late afternoon.

"Like...a date?" John gulped.

"Yes, Egderp. A date." He held out his hand. "Well? It's Sunday, so what do we have to worry about?"

"I...sure, I'll try it." He smiled shyly, taking his hand. "What did you have in mind?"

"Come on." Dave lead him to Central Park with a grin. "Check it, isn't it great?"

"Oh, wow! I've wanted to come here for a while now!" John jumped up and down. "How'd you know?"

"Because you kept saying it." He continued walking until they reached a small clearing. "First stop."

"It's beautiful, Dave." He took in the green grass, the trees, and the flowers. "It's really beautiful."

"Lie with me." Dave carefully went on his back, John following. "Wanna watch the sunset later?"

"Yeah, sounds great!" John giggled as he poked his cheek. "You know, I know what you're hiding."

He stiffened. "What?"

"You're actually a huge dork in disguise." He poked him back.

"Oh." Dave looked relieved. "Wait, no I'm not. You are, and you're denying it."

"I never denied it." John stuck out his tongue. "You know, it's peaceful here."

"Yeah. Wanna see something else?" He stood up. "Follow me."

"Yeah, okay!" He linked arms with him, and they arrived at a large circular pathway, made up of individual pieces of mosaic tile. "What's this?"

"Memorial." Dave kneeled down and traced one of the tiles. "The Imagine Memorial." He pointed to the huge word, _’IMAGINE'_ , carved into the center. "Story time."

"Ooh!" John bent down.

"You know John Lennon? This whole area is dedicated to him. The mosaic was donated by Italy, actually. And the whole place is Strawberry fields." He took a black rose out of his bag. "Here, put it on the stone."

"Okay." He did so as the blonde did the same with a second one. "He was good."

"No, John, he was fantastic. Even if you don't like him or The Beatles, it's a fact that they shaped music into what it is today. Who knows, I probably wouldn't be able to rap if it wasn't for them. That's a world I wouldn't want to live in." Dave took out a third rose. "Here."

"It's pretty!" John began to put it with the others, but was stopped. "What is it?"

"It's-it's for you," he muttered.

"Oh, wow!" He turned it over in his hands. "It's yellow with red tips! Don't different colors mean different things?"

"Yep, see the black ones we put down? That's for mourning. Well, they can also mean rebirth. Whatever." Dave pointed to the yellow one. "That means...falling in love. Falling in love with your friend."

"Dave, I...oh my god." John gripped the rose tighter. "What are you saying?"

He groaned in frustration. "I'm saying I'm in love with you, dork." He looked away. "Doesn't matter, you're always gonna be 'no homo' or whatever. I thought I might as well get it off my chest."

"Dave." He reached out.

"I spent many nights just lying awake and thinking about this. I love you, okay? I love you." Dave chuckled humorously. "Look at me, being all cliché and chick-flicky. Whatever." He moved to get up and leave. "It was nice being your friend, John."

"You idiot!" John pulled him back down. "I'm not homo, but you know what? I am for you." John squeaked as he was pulled into a needy kiss, then went completely limp. How do you kiss someone? He tried to copy him, and let out a quiet moan when he bit his lip.

"Sorry, sorry." He pulled away. "Should've warned you."

"No, it's okay. I liked it." He blushed a deep shade of red. "First kiss, and it was with a Strider."

"Good, I want you all to myself." Dave smiled as the sun began to set. "You look beautiful."

"I'm not beautiful," John pouted.

"Alright, you're cute. No take-backs." He looked down at his watch, realizing he had to go. "John, I-" He stopped.

It was worth it.

"Yeah?" He tilted his head.

"Nothing, I just love you a lot." Dave stroked his hair. "Seriously, it's far from ironic."

"Mmhmm." John fell asleep, and he carried him back home.


	7. Coming Apart

**Trigger warning: Abuse.**

"Oh, hello Dave." John's dad opened the door. "Did John fall asleep?"

"Yeah, here you go." Dave handed him over. "We went to see some stuff, I guess it wore him out."

"Yes, I see." "He was silent for a moment. "You know, I can't think of anyone better than you dating my son."

"How'd you know?!" he squawked.

"I didn't, but now I do." His dad shot him a sly smile before shutting the door.

"Ugh, Egberts." Dave suddenly opened the door. "Tell him I love and miss him!" He took a deep breath, then headed home. There'd be hell to pay.

"Where were you?" Dirk asked evenly as he slipped into the apartment.

"On a date," he replied truthfully.

"Really?" He raised an eyebrow. "I'm proud, little man. What's her name?"

"John."

"What?"

"It was John. We went to Strawberry Fields, and we kissed a little bit." Dave leaned against the wall. "I like him a lot."

"I thought I told you not to be with boys anymore. I didn't raise a faggot." Dirk tapped his katana against the floor.

"It's who I am, Bro. I can't change." He tried to brace himself.

"And you came home late," he continued. "Alright, on your knees so I can beat the shit out of you."

"I don't take orders from you," Dave growled.

"You little shit." Dirk punched him in the stomach, causing him to hit the wall. "You will listen to me!"

"Fuck off, you monster." He hissed in pain as the katana cut into his arm. "Son of a bitch!"

"You're more of one," he spat. "Nobody likes you. You're so fucking worthless, they just feel sorry for you. But they shouldn't, you're too low to be pitied. Like a worm." He grabbed him by the wrist, no doubt leaving finger-shaped bruises.

"Put. Me. Down." Dave was able to kick him in the crotch and run to his room. He'd be safe for a bit, but how long? He pushed his dresser up against the door.

"Open up!" Dirk kicked the door, but it wouldn't budge. "Fine. You gotta come out sometime, brat." He left with a grumble.

"Fuck." He looked down at his leg. Probably would scar. He ripped one of his shirts to hold against the wound.

Then his computer went off.

"Huh?" Dave sat up, looking at his computer. Pesterchum.

EB: hi, dave!  
TG: sup  
EB: sorry for falling asleep. how are you?  
TG: never better  
EB: hey, i got a question.  
EB: can we do that again sometime? strawberry fields was great!  
TG: you wanna go back  
EB: yeah! I mean, if you're up to it!  
TG: yeah id like that a lot  
EB: great! i gotta go now, bye! i love you!

He stepped away from the computer. Maybe he should've asked for help.

No, only the weak would do such a thing.

But how much longer could he take it?

TG: WAIT  
EB: hm?  
TG:  
TG: never mind  
EB: alright, see you tomorrow!

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 20:25 --

Dave tried to control his breathing, but it wasn't working. He began to hyperventilate, then go into a panic attack. "H-h-help m-me," he whispered. "Someone...someone help me." He sat up. "Help me...HELP ME!"


	8. Cold Embrace

**Trigger warning: Abuse, death.**

"Hungry..." Dave sat up, debating whether or not to leave his room. Dirk could be waiting outside to beat the everloving shit out of him. But food. He rarely got any, and he could see his own ribs. Was it really worth it?

Well, here we go.

Dave pushed his dresser out of the way, opening the door. "Gotta move fast." He glanced around the corner, seeing nothing. Dirk's room was closed, meaning he was likely in there.

"Go." He tiptoed to the kitchen, then was immediately scooped up.

"Where do you think you're going, brat?" Dirk held him out at arm's length.

"Put. Me. Down." Dave tried to bite his hand.

"You got it, little man." He let go, allowing him to hit the tiled floor with a thud. "I swear to god, I will break every bone in your fucking body for what you did."

"Fuck you!" He bit his lip as he punched him in the stomach, then gasped at the second blow. The air was forced out of him, and he tried to take a deep breath.

"You're not escaping me anytime soon, you hear?" Dirk kicked him in the leg until a loud 'crack' was heard, followed by Dave whimpering in pain. "Cry, go ahead. Cry like a weakling."

Dave held back his tears, refusing to give him the satisfaction of seeing him break. He had to be strong. "No." He stumbled to his feet, but remembered his broken leg far too late, crashing to the ground.

"Dumbass," he sighed. "When will you ever learn? You don't deserve to exist, you know why? Because you're nothing."

"John...makes me feel...like I'm everything," he wheezed.

"Will you shut up about him?!" Dirk began kicking him, breaking a couple ribs and leaving dozens of bruises. "YOU'RE A DISGUSTING FAGGOT, DAVE! HOW DO YOU LIVE WITH YOURSELF?! I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!"

"THEN DO IT, ASSHOLE!" Dave cried out as he stomped on his arm. "DO IT!"

"I WILL!" He drew his katana, leaving cuts all over his body. "IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED?! TO RUIN MY LIFE?! THAT'S WHAT YOU FUCKING DID!"

"IT WAS WORTH IT, YOU MONSTER!" His head was pounding, and each breath he took was painful. "Monster...you aren't my brother. I hate you."

"I hate you more, you miserable sack of shit!" Dirk slapped him across the face. "Just die already!"

"Make me, bitch! I'm not ever going to give up! I'll do it for John, because I know he cares! He doesn't think I'm worthless! I have plenty of people who care!" Dave wiped at the tears welling up in his eyes.

"They feel sorry for you and you know it!" He sliced into his arm. "You know it well!"

"No!" But the seed of doubt was already planted in his mind. Karkat, Terezi, Rose, Jade, Roxy, Dirk (his cousin), Jake, Jane, John...they didn't care, did they? They never cared.

And he never felt so alone in his sixteen years of life.

"Listen to me when I'm talking to you!" Dirk cut his leg deep, then dropped the katana in horror. "Oh my god."

"Wha?" Dave looked down, eyes widening. Blood spurted from the wound, and he realized he hit the femoral artery. It was over.

"I'm sorry, I didn't..." He covered his face, then ran to get the phone.

Dave coughed weakly, getting his own out of his pocket and opening Pesterchum. Hurry, hurry.

"John..."

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 20:42 --

TG: john i love y


	9. Could've Done Different

"Hey, Jade!" John grinned. "How are you?"

"Good!" Jade chirped. "Something just tells me this day will be very interesting!"

"Yeah, I feel it too! I'll see you second period!" He skipped into his first class, positively beaming. The bell rang, and he noticed Dave's seat was empty. Again?

"Um..." Ms. Serket entered the room, looking very upset. "I, um..."

"Spit it out!" Karkat shouted.

"L-last night..." She gripped her desk, knuckles turning white. "D-Dave was killed by his b-brother."

Time froze, and everyone looked at her in horror.

"Dave, he..." John retched, then vomited.

"No, no, no!" Karkat jumped into Terezi's arms, beating on her chest weakly. "It's not true, it's just a sick fucking joke! Tell me it is!"

"Karkat," Terezi whimpered, kissing his cheek.

"Fuck...fuck!" Jake shook his head. "I refuse to believe this bollocks!"

The whole class was in turmoil, a sobbing teacher in the middle. And one very broken boy, who shot off into the hallway.

"WHY?! WHY DIDN'T I REALIZE?!" John punched the wall, his fist going right through it. "I'M SUCH A FUCKING IDIOT!" He threw the school doors open, running all the way home.

"Son?" His dad jumped as he burst into the house. "What-"

"He's dead," he whispered. "Dave is dead."

"John..." He picked him up, hugging him. "I'm sorry. I don't know what happened, but I'm sorry."

"I-I loved h-him," John sobbed. "L-loved him so m-much!"

"I know, I know." His dad rocked him back and forth. "He told me to tell you he loves you, by the way."

"I love you too!" he shouted, looking up at the ceiling. "Fuck, I love you so, so much! Why didn't I realize?!"

"John!" Someone kicked the door open. "John!"

"What the?" His dad looked up.

"John!" Karkat, Terezi, Rose, Jade, Dirk (the cousin), Jake, Roxy, and Jane streamed in. "Fuck, fuck!" Karkat fell to his knees with a squeak.

"Karkat, baby, shh." Terezi kissed his tears away.

"John, oh my god, I'm sorry!" Roxy slurred slightly, obviously more drunk than usual. "So sorry!"

"John!" Karkat sniffed, then threw himself at him. "It's all my fault! I should've known!"

"Wait." Everyone turned to Dirk. "No, it's my fault."

"What do you mean?" Jake touched his shoulder.

"I knew."

"What?" John's head shot up.

"I knew he was being abused." Dirk's lip wobbled. "He told me."

"Why didn't you fucking say anything, you bastard?!" Karkat grabbed him by the shirt. "Why?! Why?!?!"

"He made me promise not to tell anyone, dick! You think I wanted him to suffer?! He was my cousin, and I loved him! Maybe he told me because I was the only one he could trust!" He threw his hands up. "And it happened over time, because I reminded him too much of his asshole brother! Don't you dare start with me!"

"Dirk..." Jake allowed him to cry into his shoulder, rubbing his back. "It's okay, it's not your fault."

"I hate myself," John choked, then flinched as something was placed in his hands. "What?"

"I-I got these," Dirk whispered. "W-went into the hose and found these on the floor. Potential evidence, but I don't care. You should have them."

"Oh my god..." He stared down at the shades, sniffling. "Dirk, thank you. Thank you so much!"

"No problem, kid." He hesitated for a moment. "He loved you a lot, he kept asking me for advice. I'm so, so sorry."

"I forgive you." John wiped his eyes. "But god, do I love him." He shook his head. "It's...it's not fair! It's not fair! We were gonna-" He threw himself at Karkat. "WHY?!"

"Fuckass," Karkat squeaked, and they all cried together.


	10. Final Resolutions

"I can't do this."

"Come on, son."

"God, I don't think..." John took a deep breath, then walked up to the coffin.

Dave was lying in it, his face bruised and cut. However, he was smiling.

"Why did he...?" He looked at his phone.

TG: john i love y

"Was he thinking of me?" John stiffened as a hand touched his shoulder.

"Of course he was, nookwhiff." Karkat offered him a pained smile. "You're the last thing he thought of."

"But...it's my fault. His brother killed him because we got together," he whispered. "Was that...was that how it was when he found out you were with him?"

He sucked in air through his teeth. "He was in the hospital with a broken arm. Told them he fell down the stairs. He broke it off as soon as he got out, and I agreed to keep him safe. Well, safer."

"You still loved him?" John tilted his head.

"John, I never stopped. I was jealous of you, okay? I missed him." Karkat tried to smile again. "You writhing apeshitting sparklefuck."

"Good to have you back." He took a glance at the coffin. "I dreamed about him last night."

"Me too. What happened?" They walked outside to get some air.

"He told me he still loves me, but I have to move on," John croaked. "And take care of...you."

"He told me the same thing." Karkat bit his lip. "Was he trying to hook us up?"

"Maybe, but I don't want to disappoint him. I'll take care of you, okay?" He grinned, taking his hand.

"Yeah, I'll probably need it." He deflated. "I got dumped. Terezi left me for Gamzee."

"Seriously? Eh, she doesn't know what she's missing. You're a great guy, Karkat." John took Dave's shades out of his pocket and put them on. "Let's go."

"Yeah," Karkat muttered, following him back inside.

"Five bucks says they'll get together," someone called from the bushes.

"Bloody hell, Dirk! Too soon!" Jake smacked the blonde. "Good lord!"

**THE END**


End file.
